A (cooked) Dinner Party

On Sunday, my friend hosted a dinner party. She's a chef at Prune and she had prepared a table full of gourmet food. There was stuffed endives, asparagus wrapped in bacon, beet salad, mushrooms, eggs, cookies, cheese&bread and some sort of stuffed marshmellow puffs. What she created was a labor of love...too bad she wasn't able to enjoy it.

Before I started transformation, I ate at Prune and it was amazing. I have utter appreciation and respect for her passion in food. I had told her about the Transformation program and she knew I was not going to eat her food at the dinner party. I made sure that this was clear in order for her to not take it personally. She totally understood and so, I decided to go.

I was content with my Hijiki salad. Others enjoyed it as well. One said it was so refreshing. Another asked why I was only eating the Hijiki. I shared with them the program. One girl looked at me and said, "Oh yeah, I know about that," then proceeded to roll her eyes while she expressed that she just doesn't get it. She didn't want to get it, either. And this was all fine. We ended up talking about art and the amazing exhibit at the Guggenheim: Cai Guo-Qiang.

My friend, the host, hardly sat down to eat and enjoy the comradery. She was exhausted and not very pleasent. The mood was dampened. It was weird. And then I thought...is it even worth it? Is it worth it to cook for a full day, not enjoy the full meal or the company of others? I was getting upset with her and then I kept repeating....hold space, hold space....nothing is personal, just hold space. But seriously...what's the point in making food for others if you, yourself, can't enjoy it?